blaaake is free!

ahhh! i knew all this good news couldn't last! it seems our favourite crap husband, blake fielder-civil, is now a free man! according to the telegraph, blaaake is now in rehab. amy is reported to be at her camden home (as pictured above).

shit. things were going so well! obama is the new pres, winehouse's record label boss called her demos "sensational", and now this!? i really hope that blaaake has a healing effect on our heroine. she deserves it!

btw don't her ballet slippers gleam?

BLAAAKE RELEASED

me & quincy jones

hello lovelies! first and foremost, before any wino talk, i have to yell to the rooftops:

GO-BAMA! :)

i've been so busy this week expressing my disgust over the jonathan ross/russell brand witch hunt and following the US election i've not kept up on my winehouse news. there hasn't been much, except that our heroine is out of the hospital and looking...kind of...sober and pretty? there's a look in her eyes in the above photo, a look of lucid sanity. like obama, it's damned refreshing!

anyway, today i read that amy has found a new friend in quincy jones, the uber-producer. a source reveals:

"Quincy has taken her under his wing and put her back onto the wagon...The two are collaborating on one or two projects and if anyone in the world can save a talent like Amy then it is 'Q'. He helped relaunch Michael Jackson's career with the Thriller album and has been responsible for countless hits over the years. He knows that if she can start to get her music career sorted then everything else should fit into place."

wino's spokesperson also said:

"They met at the Nelson Mandela concert in the summer and got chatting. He's a big fan of hers and she him. I know that she is also doing a number for the Quincy Jones' tribute album."

what's going on today? obama is elected and winehouse is on the mend? i think i might explode!!

AMY & QUINCY JONES

pas de rehab

yesterday, the rumour was wino went to rehab. today, mitch's words are vindicated, as she actually IS in hospital for a chest infection. her spokesperson says:

“Amy is in hospital being checked out with for a chest infection. She is not back in rehab...She should be fine and is expected to return home soon.”

i haven't had coffee yet, so i'm not so witty in the brainbox. i'll just issue a standard, "get well amy!!!"

WINO IN HOSPITAL

rehab redux

this is starting to get old. in order to avoid being arrested for punching some dancer at the end of summer ball, wino has headed to yet another stint in rehab, this time in the harley street clinic. as usual, mitch has opened his big mouth to tell us all that his daughter is suffering from a "chest infection". more details to follow, i am sure!


WINO ESCAPES ARREST BY GOING TO REHAB

wino's intercom interview

our heroine has not been seen in public since the "end of summer" fiasco, but she did give an impromptu interview to some ballsy french woman through her camden intercom. there was talk of blaaake, bien sur, but nothing revelatory.

my favourite part of the interview is this exchange:

frenchie: "what can i wish for you amy?"

amy: "huh?"

frenchie: "what can we wish you for the future?"

amy: "don't worry about me, worry about yourselves and promise me you'll buy my album"

...just like brian wilson did...

our heroine has finally said "screw you world" and taken to her bed. aw, poor girl. she missed her DJ set at the monarch pub last thursday night, saying she was bedridden. a source says:

"She's always showed up when she's been down to play here before, but apparently tonight she can't get out of bed. She's been looking so thin and haggard lately, it's a real worry."

in other depressing wino news, it has been rumoured that she has completely stopped working on her third album because she hasn't written any worthwhile songs. le sigh.

ALBUM #3 ON HOLD

WINO LIES IN BED

tuesday sorbet: ADELE

adele is something else. at just 20 years old, she was nominated for this year's mercury prize for her self-penned album, "19". she performed on SNL this past weekend and kicked some serious butt. what a fantastic voice!

here is her video for her latest hit, "cold shoulder". the chorus is as catchy as a cold!

wino be jammin'

be prepared for your eyes, ears and subconscious mind to be assaulted. this youtube clip has been online for a few months but is picking up steam, having appeared lately on a few blogs (including perez hilton). it features wino jamming in her studio with a family of leeches, um, i mean some friends.

there are so many disturbing elements to this clip: wino's distended stomach, the glee in the voices of the hangers-on as they start the tape, the lonely xylophone guy...it's like a freaky post-modern german horror film with a really bad soundtrack. watch and judge, my pretties, but only if you're in a strong state of mind. if you're feeling even remotely fragile, this will send you directly to bed for a nap.

candy darling

i'm a few days late on reporting the "coke-and-candy-floss" story, which i will blame on two turkeys and a lasagna. here it is, from gigwise, and i 'believe this is verbatim...':

Amy Winehouse has reportedly thought up a brand spanking new way of taking cocaine – mixing it with candyfloss.

The 25-year-old singer was apparently spurred on by Babyshambles' lead guitarist Mick Whitnall after she bought a candyfloss machine for £700.

According to the News of the World, Wino loves the concoction so much that and has even held 'Coke and Candy' parties at her house.

A 'pal' said: “It was Mik’s idea. The candyfloss machine was Amy’s pride and joy and he thought it would be funny to give it a boost...He and some pals sprinkled a wrap of coke into the mixture and Amy started eating it before she realised what they’d done. She now thinks it’s a hoot to do the same.”

yegads! i thought vodka pops were decadent!

knives out

when a rock star compares their own destiny to that of sid vicious, it's only a matter of time before something really bad happens. it is alleged that amy held a knife to her chest in a desperate cry for help, saying "What is the point of living?". a friend revealed:

“Amy said she was ‘caught up in a nightmare’...Her friends managed to get the knife away from her but are now holding a 24-hour watch on her...Amy has a death wish. Her emotions are exaggerated. She is either high as a kite or, when she hears something she doesn't like, she's suicidal...She is all for this stupid Sid Vicious notion of dying young. She is not scared of it and believes it is her destiny."

man, this is depressing stuff for a monday morning. i've got a miserable cold at the moment and thought i felt rotten enough- now after reading today's winehouse headlines i'm wiped right out. when the fuzz in my head clears, perhaps i will have some witticisms to impart. but for now i'll leave you with wino's funeral themed video for "back to black". it seems appropriate.



WINO: "CAUGHT IN A NIGHTMARE"

blaaake maaakes mitch twitch

blaaake has written a lot of icky letters from jail over the past months, but this time he might have gone too far. mitch winehouse claims he received a 6-page letter from blaaake rife with violent threats and abuse. the letter is now in the hands of police; a source close to mitch says:

“I could hear Mitch physically shaking when he phoned to tell me about the letter...He couldn’t even bring himself to read it out loud as it was just too sickening...But he told me that Blake described graphic scenes from a horror movie, in which Mitch is the victim...Part of Mitch wants to pursue this further with the police, maybe even taking out a restraining order...But then he is worried about it all driving a wedge between him and Amy.”

the question is: whose side will wino be on? her father's or her waste-of-space husband's? i'd like to think she'd side with the former, but something tells me she'd stand by her blaaake and make excuses. "he's just creative, dad! he wants to write a screenplay, don't you know? he just wanted some feedback!"

BLAAAKE'S POISON PEN STRIKES AGAIN